Story Gordon

Success is Simple, but it's not easy.

 

success (n): The accomplishment of an aim or purpose [OED]

 

    Success is simple, but it’s not easy because all it takes is setting a goal, then achieving it. It’s difficult because we have more talents than we can actualize in our limited time with the resources available; therefore, choosing better goals can be daunting, yet success is possible as we continue becoming an original by persisting… no… matter… what.

 

We’re on a quest, we seek success
to live our bliss, to feel the zest
that flows within as our[true]self
engaging what is on our shelf.

 

     It’s been more than 30,000 days since my journey began; 25,000 since I launched this quest for success. If your goal is living as the original you keep becoming you may find value in the six elements of my success model: Our Success Premise(s), The Success Fundamentals, The Success Triad, The Success Questions, The Stages of Living. and The Success Process. It works for me, yours will differ. There is also a bit about me on the back. These are ideas to consider not directions to follow by

 

1. Our Success Premise(s)

    “Humanity’s basic behest is living it’s quest for success wherever it is, no matter what, with a goal of being more helpful than not.” (The first line of my daily journal)

    While I am convinced everything in the cosmos has a place and purpose, each participating as a part of a wondrous whole, we humans have a bonus: cognition and choosing. Using these we seek success (the accomplishment of aims and purposes) in our changing mission. As originals, we are called to identify, then actualize our[true]self through actions and behaviors flowing from a healthy worldview.

Success begins with a core premise, a statement of intention which I see as:

     We are called to do what we really want to do while being the who we really want to be, both flowing from seeing ourselves, others and the rest of it as clearly as possible with a personal goal of being more helpful than not.

     Easy to say; hard to achieve as we change some with each outcome. Success means adjusting premises as needed.

     At thirteen I was going to marry Carolyn and live happily ever after. It didn’t happen. At seventeen I wanted to marry Frances and live happily ever after. It happened at nineteen and lasted more than sixty three years.

    Since then my changing premises have succeeded and failed. I believe it’s more important to have clear premises than not lest we find ourselves adrift.

    Now in stage seven of living, my premise is having the resolve to live as the original I am while encouraging others to be originals, too. Succeeding begins as we pay attention to everything we see as important, refining a healthy mindset.

    Living as the original I keep becoming is the essential success provided I am being more helpful than not.

 

2. The Success Fundamentals

    Whatever we achieve, our greater successes are realized when we master the basics. While well known, documented, for objective goals, living life as an original is accomplished by discovering the playbook we weren’t issued at birth, although there is evidence that some, maybe much of it, is in our DNA. Every person’s success essentials with be unique; however, they may include some of these or more:

 

A. Desire: Wanting to achieve a particular goal.

B. Motivation: The reason(s) for pursuing it.

C. Commitment: Investing the necessary time, focused.

D. Competence: Achieving excellence, then maintaining it.

E. Persistence: Staying the course, no… matter… what…

 

    My significant accomplishments can be characterized in this sentence: “I have been successful when I identified a specific objective, had compelling reasons to do so, then committed the time, focus and resources to attain the desired result… no matter what.”

    Ironically, my most fulfilling successes followed failures, a common characteristic among so many of the successful. For instance, in high school I wanted to become a math and science teacher. It didn’t happen. Failing at college I joined the Air Force where I was trained as a radar technician, doing so well in tech school I was assigned as an instructor. Returning to college I attained an electrical engineering degree then worked as such on a professional journey which became a changing course for forty years through sales, product management and technical seminar development and delivery until I retired in 2001.

 

Suggestion: Considering past achievements, identify your success essentials then complete this sentence stem to identify your personal nature, “I am successful when I …”

 

3. The Success Triad

    My success quest has been a meandering along life’s path beginning in 1956 when I was trained as a radar technician, reinforced when I married Frances in 1957. It seems I have been in right place at the right time more than sixty years, fully immersed in seeking to live as an original.

    In my view successes are achieved three ways: activities, behavior, perception. (What we are doing; who we are being; how we are seeing.)

    The first two—doing and being—identify a duality sages have debated for ages. It is highlighted on this desk plaque:

“The way to do is to be.”   Lao Tzu

“The way to be is to do."   Nietzsche

“Do-Be-Do-Be-Do…"       Sinatra

  

    One storied view of the doing/being dyad is of Jesus visiting Mary and Martha in Bethany (Luke 10:38-42) where Martha was busy with meal preparations, “doing for”, while Mary was engaged in “being with” Jesus, attending His presence which Jesus saw as a better way.

    Both are important, but “being with” is often the better way. Yes, there are times when each is most appropriate, yet I remember John Bradshaw’s reminder, “We are human beings, not human doings.”

    The third, perception, seeing, is our worldview. The truly successful, those who live humanely, develop and continue refining theirs which includes knowledge, beliefs and opinions as free from biases as possible.

    In my view, “Success is theirs who are doing what they want to do while being who they want to be as an original self, with others, and the rest of it, seeing all from a healthy perspective with a single proviso: Being more helpful than not.” Easy to say, hard to do, yet possible when we focus.

 

4. The Success Questions

    “What’s up?” “How’s it going?” “Any news?” The National Enquirer is correct: Inquiring minds want to know. While curiosity may have kill the cat, it’s a core human quality. Watch infants taking it all in. They are seeking answers to life’s early questions. My success checklist includes these five, each answer is a prerequisite for the next:

 

1: What’s it about? What’s what about? Everything. Everything that’s important at the time. What’s the cosmos about? Earth? Life? Human life? My life? Your life? The answers comprise a healthy worldview, our foundation for success.

2: Who am I? As a person? With others? In the cosmic scheme? Knowing who we are now is critical.

3: Where am I going? What’s my mission? My vision?

4: Who will go with me? Who are my fellow travelers?

5: How will I participate? What am I doing? Who am I being? How clearly am I seeing myself, others and the rest of it? How am I helping more than not?

 

    Knowing place and purpose encourages self-actualizing as our[true]self. The evolving answers make continued success elusive. It’s important to refine each one as a set point for the next, especially the Q3 and Q4 because when we are more concerned with who will go with us than where we are headed we may detour from our purpose.

    As I recall, in his book, Fire in the Belly, Sam Keen noted that Howard Thurman told Paul Tillich, “The two most important questions in life are ‘Where am I going and who will go with me. If we get them reversed we are sunk.’”

    While the epithets we recall as reinforcement can be excellent success triggers. Our original ideas are more valid.

    Being curious about everything we see as important may be the most influential quality in our pursuit of success. What are your answers to the questions. That’s the ticket.

 

5. The Stages of Living

    My life has progressed in stages of thirteen years or so making this the seventh. Two sources inform this view: Shakespeare and Eric Hoffer. In As You Like It, the Bard lists seven “ages”: Childhood, Schoolboy, Lover, Soldier, Justice, Retiree and a Second Childishness “Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.” Hoffer believed life evolved in stages of thirteen years. Combining these and testing them against my journey, revealed the stages I traversed:

 

1: Childhood (0-13): A period of biological maturation.

2: Adolescence (13-26): Mental maturity. Growing up.

3: Individuation (26-39): Forming a self-identity.

4: Focusing (39-50): Narrowing my success pursuit.

5: Mastery (50-63): Participating as a specialist.

6: Elderhood (65-78): Retiring to personal pursuits.

7: Advocacy (78-on): Reaching a philosophical plateau.

 

    Those are mine. What are yours? While the first three seem to be a universal sequence (biological, cognitive, self-realization), what follows will vary depending on our emerging originality. We are similar, not identical, peers.

    For many of the successful a metamorphosis occurs near forty: Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress, Mother Teresa began her missionary work, Bill Gates formed the Gates Foundation and I moved from the surface of technology into its depths leading me into stage five at fifty where I explained the Internet through seminars. Retiring into stage six I set aside technology to pursue the personal interests for which I had little time earlier.

    Success in every stage seems driven by a desire to live as an original. Joseph Campbell spoke of Arthurian knights going on a “gral quest” by entering the forest at different places, then following their most authentic path. It’s an analogy that works for me. What are your success stages?

 

6. The Success Process

    Repeating the premise: Success is simple, but it’s not easy because we have more talents than we can actualize within the given constraints, living as an evolving original.

    I see the success process as a continuous loop: Pay attention, Focus on the important, Assess the situation, Consider options, Choosing what seems better, then Pay attention to the outcomes then begin the next loop.

    Of all the senses, the sixth, that inner voice, our muse, is catalytic. It’s unending flow of ideas are clues to consider, yet can be distracting. Since every action causes a small change in the quest, my resolution is to accept what comes next and keep moving. Easy to say; hard to do.

    One popular success theme is, “Be yourself.” It’s the core message of serious sages. Great idea, but difficult to achieve other than in glimpses as originality is elusive. We have peers, not equals. Which goals are worth seeking?

    The epitome of originality is doing what we really want to do while being who we really want to be as we see ourselves, others and the rest of it clearly with a keen focus on being more helpful than not which seems simple enough, yet is difficult to achieve except in those epiphanic moments when awareness dissolves into timeless actualization.

    My solution is staying focused on activities, behavior and perception. It begins when I awake then prepare for the day with a writing meditation, my on ramp to the new day, actualizing my participation.

    Finally, it takes courage to live as our[true]self, not the bravery needed in mortal combat, but a resolve to discover and participating as an original for the good of self, others and the rest of it. Finally: It’s that simple, but it’s not easy, yet it is possible when we persist, especially as we encourage others to live as originals.

   

   © 2020-21 Gordon Hill (posted 4/7/21)